wishes....

i cant keep my emotions in if my life depended on it... i wish things werent this way. i dont know what i could have done. i wish i was still in high school. like i always say i wish we were still together. i know i gotta pick myself up but i got like tons of weight on me. i know youre happier and thats all that matters. i know the things i say, you probably wont like and itll probably be on your conscience as you say. i wish giving up was easy, but its not. maybe im too optimistic for my own good, where every single positive what ifs are still possible. you said that i should prioritize my life and i did. i know you said that i should put school first, but youre still first as a person in my life. and you still are. i wish i could let go as easy. before you got angry at me because i called someone else my life a long time ago and i said that person was no longer my life. i just wanted to prove that you are my life and now i shouldnt consider you to be my life. i guess i shouldnt wish for this wish anymore...i wish you could be my life one day. i guess thats why i do so much, just too much. youre a special person. only one in the world, that what makes you unique. i guess the only thing i wish for was i wish you still love me. but i guess genie's rules still applies here too, i can't make anyone fall in love, nor you shouldnt force yourself too like someone. nothing beats unconditional. i guess thats all i can say for now...cept i love you
-terry