day off tomorrow

sighh i dont know what to do tomorrow now. a month ago i was really happy that i got a day off, which meant i could visit you at logan for a day. but now i dont think i can because i dont want it to seem like it was too much. i dont know, this isnt the best thing to say but i love you still and its hard getting over you. i wish i could visit and just hug you and do what couples do. i guess things have changed since a month ago. i dont want to worry people or go off on random rambling. today felt really long as usual without you. looking forward to your "hiya" when i got home, looking forward to a hug when i got back to UC on fridays. i really miss that. although yesterday was our talk i understand you better when it was in person reather than over aim. i guess im still looking at the "what ifs" and now i have to stand on the side living my life with you living yours. ill figure myself out too as college moves on. already planned that im getting a job next year and trying to pay for a share home with paolo and kha...we'll see what happens. iono i still want to be the reason for your happiness but like you said youre happier without me there so ill have to accept it. im still trying to get over the fact that i cant wait for you anymore, but i guess that feeling wont go away anytime soon. i wish i could tell you in person, face to face, over aim, anything to let you know that i love you and i still care about you. i guess for now i gotta give you your space to grow and live life. as for me...more days that continue to move slow. like i said those many days before to your teacher..."i just want you to be happy"